Category Archives: Virgin River

This episode kicks off with the best song ever!

Okay, it wasn’t this song, but it should have been. Because tonight is THE night!

But, let’s back up because everybody is indeed feeling fine in this episode. Mel has obvs bounced back from her D&C (😭) because she is jamming out and cookin’ up a storm. Please take a look at the stack of pancakes on this table.

And she tells Jack:

Just a hunch… I think Mel might be eating her feelings.

Anyway, as the boys of *NSYNC taught us Now is the time for us to reunite, which is why Mel is off to hang out with Vern. It’s nice to see these two together again. And he takes the occasion to invite her back to the clinic.

Okay, I’m not a doctor, but I feel like this is a pretty terrible way to try to deal with grief. Won’t she be dealing with lots of pregnant people? Work is important for paying bills; it doesn’t fix your life. Then again, no one in this town seems to work very much. (See, for example: Brie.)

Wait, that’s not true… there is one guy who is so hard at work he’s working three jobs! Brady, despite being homeless, is over-employed at this point.

First, he’s an undercover informant (again?). I still don’t think this is super legal, but ooooookay.

Are you just allowed to secretly tape people for evidence in a criminal case if you’re not, you know, law enforcement? Do you not need training to wear a wire? Shouldn’t they maybe plan this a tiny bit more? Doesn’t matter because, like *NSYNC said, Brady is here To make you people scream. And he does it by l showing his chest again…

…and again.

Okay, we get it — Brady didn’t have pancakes for breakfast. But that’s only because he doesn’t have time to eat. He is working all the damn time. Look at this.

The man has 54 unread messages! Who is texting Brady? His GF just broke up with him; his only friend, Jeb, is dead (RIP, Jeb). Why so many texts? Is it just Old Navy reminding him to use his Super Cash before it expires?

Shady Brady is also making sure the weed people are set up for some free glamping, which is super considerate.

This was Jack’s idea because

Does Jack have memory loss? This WAS him like three weeks ago (time moves sooo slow in VR! Is Charmaine still pregnant?) when his. house. burned. down.

Anyway, I think one of those texts on Brady’s phone was Lizzie asking what to wear on her first day at her new job. (Remember when they connected at the town fair? They definitely exchanged LinkedIn handles.) And the advice he gave her was dress for the job you want to have. Check this outfit out!

She is taking this promotion SERIOUSLY, and I just have one question: What shoes do you wear with a tweed shorts-suit?

One thing’s for sure — she is definitely outranking Denny professionally, who is sounding a bit more like when he first turned up in VR.

I can’t wait to see Denny in a pair of mechanic coveralls. Do they sell those at Old Navy? Maybe he and Brady can carpool.

Anyway, Brady is so busy with his three jobs (he’s also in charge of running construction on the glamping site), that Brie now has time to go back to work — LOLZ! I’m kidding! Brie’s hanging out at home with her new bestie and doing a great job convincing us of her passion for sports.

Using the word “sir” indictates a real level of disgust.

Despite her burning passion for the big game, Brie uses this opportunity to finally make a move… and ask Mike to join her company softball team.

What was happening at this bachelor party? Now, I cannot line dance, but how wild was this trip to Tennessee? Also, how big is this company that it is both located near enough to VR for her to commute to (ha!) but also has enough people for a softball team?

Alright, forget I said anything about these logistics and let *NSYNC carry you away…

everything’s gonna be alright/
Just get up, feel the flow/
And here we go

Muriel has moved in with Cameron, and it’s super chill, as she tells the ladies at the sewing circle. Cameron makes steak for dinner (super normal weeknight meal) regals her with a fascinating story about being mostly naked in front of his whole school (as you do with a co-worker/housemate), and then she KISSES HIM!

Go Muriel!!!

Now, I don’t want to have notes on this, but DHC immediately follows the kiss by saying:

What exactly is the code of ethics at the clinic? Because two seconds ago you were talking about being in your underwear. You also danced with this woman at work. So, where’s the line, Cam? Also couldn’t Muriel just quit? She literally VOLUNTEERED her way into this gig. Anyway, because she’s a queen, he has a great comeback.

I am rooting so hard for this woman.

BTW, remember when she made a play for doc? Maybe she should think twice about going for Doc 2.0. No, scratch that. Don’t think, Muriel. Just feel free and feel the rhythm.

Besides, Doc has bigger fish to fry (see what I did there?) because Rose (who?) wants to come for a visit (what?) tomorrow (why?) and it’s time he asks her the question that’s definitely been keeping me up at night.

So, I’m guessing he’s gonna call in sick tomorrow. Muriel and Cam should just Keep dancin’ all night long/until the break of dawn.

Now, this episode COULD have been a real bummer. To recap, the town was almost wiped off the face of the planet until Hope found a way to save them all. (Note: this plan wasn’t covered in her fire safety plan, which again makes me feel they should revisit their emergency preparations…)

Anyway, it’s time for us to move into recovery mode, folks. And you know what recovery mode is code for? S-E-X.

How thrilling is it that Lizzie, a woman who was once not allowed to get birth control, can now stay the night at the home of her employer and have sexy time with her boyfriend, who is living with his grandparents. Hope and Vern are so chill!

Also, let’s flashback and remember that one of Lizzie’s issues with Ricky was the fact that he lived with his grandma.

Eh… not every match is meant to be. Consider Vernon and DMC.

Here’s what makes ZERO sense to me: didn’t Cameron take this job knowing at some point Doc would retire? Vern said he was hiring a replacement — that’s literally what he told Mel when he started looking for another doctor.

Anyway, Cam’s on the fence about this entire proposal.

What he’s not on the fence about? MURIEL!!!!

THIS. IS. HAPPENING!

Things are also heating up between Melissa and Brady.

Hehehe! Just kidding. Brady’s life is garbage right now.

He is homeless AND jobless AND things are still on the rocks with Brie. (Notice how Brady is the only member of the main cast whose home burned down… all the businesses we frequent also survived.)

But, never forget: Brady’s a hero.

A legit hero.

Things are also looking a little rough for Preacher since he found out the woman who he slept with after asking exactly zero questions turned out to be married.

And she, Preacher, will never ask you where that body is.

Anyway, Kaia makes everything right. See, the thing is she was gonna get a divorce, but there were complicating factors.

Happens to the best of us, girl.

Anyway, Jay is totally chill with this divorce.

What I liked most about this is that even though they are splitting up, they still go to social events together.

Anyway, it’s nice that she and Preacher are finding a way forward.

Denny and Lizzie are also finding a way forward by deciding neither one of them is going to graduate college.

Okay, before we can talk more about Stanford, let’s take a look at Lizzie’s outfit.

Who put this ensemble together? What is this sweater?

Clearly the writers knew this ep was gonna be a real bummer because of Mel’s pregnancy and half the town burning down (which we have not seen, but it happened!), so they decided to have costumes punch up the looks in this ep for added joy. And you know, it worked.

Look 1: Muriel’s cat sweatshirt

And Lizzie is being promoted!

Chief of staff?! What staff? Also, let’s just take a peek at the roles and responsibilities for this job via Indeed:

• ensuring the CEO’s involvement in key decision-making processes (Hope makes all decisions unilaterally)
• preparing the CEO and other leaders for upcoming meetings and providing them with all the necessary information (The only info Hope needs comes from the sewing circle)
• taking care of internal and external communications, such as newsletters, speeches, reports and presentations (When have we seen Hope need to do any of this? And aren’t all her speeches just off-the-cuff?)
• managing organization-wide programs or initiatives (Okay, this one may be legitimate in the aftermath of the devastating fire)
• leading strategic planning processes and ensuring the alignment of ideas between the CEO and other leaders (What other leaders? Jack?)
• assisting with the creation of key performance indicators (KPIs) (No one in Virgin River has ever heard of a KPI.)
• directing members in other CEO support roles, such as executive assistants and senior project managers (There are no support roles. Everyone here is equal.)
• managing the budget cycle process, which could include assisting managers with their budget presentations (What budget? Remember the state of Mel’s place when she first came to town? Here, I’ll remind you.)

• researching and defining new business opportunities (I guess Lizzie and Melissa could talk…)
• overseeing special projects per the CEO and other executives’ direction (There’s no way in hell Hope would let someone else oversee something.)
• working together with the human resources department to address potential staffing issues (There is no HR department.)

I think I’ve proven my point.

Anyway, what’s clear is that we are soon to have a new power couple in VR. Will it be: Lizzie and Hope? Lizzie and Denny? Cam and Muriel? Kaia and Preacher (and Jay? threesome?)? Cam and Vern? The twists just keep coming!

I really do not understand this town’s fire safety plan. Now, I know that Hope drafted it, but did it not include provisions for the town actually catching on fire?!

Despite the “grave music,” this episode is pretty delightful, and not just because we get the ultimate Brady thirst trap.

No, this is the episode where we see what these characters are actually made of — these are the kinds of people who will run into burning buildings to save each other. Which is noble, but I can’t help but wonder why they don’t have a better emergency response plan! For example, Ready.gov clearly states you should:

“Create a fire-resistant zone that is free of leaves, debris or flammable materials for at least 30 feet from your home.”

I assume there is similar advice out there for businesses. And yet, this is the scene at Jack’s when the fire jumps the river.

Gather the umbrellas? Seems like we could have done this ages ago, fellas.

Wait, no, we couldn’t have because what were Jack and Brady doing before this whole thing?

Rescuing Hazel and the weed people! Hazel’s nameless mother is really smitten with Brady. Don’t forget: He’s a hero!

And a veteran!

And then, she makes the ultimate play — she puts her hand on Brady!

Is this the sexiest thing that’s ever happened in Virgin River? I guess impending doom makes people pretty horny because there are hands ALL OVER THE PLACE in this episode. (Remember the last episode — I mean, one hour ago — when NOBODY was touching?)

Muriel touching DMH’s back!

Hope linking arms with the evil mayor!

Poor Mel finally gets a hug!

And so does Brie!

So much smoldering romance in the face of the town getting wiped off the face of the planet. But, of all these pairings, the one I’m rooting for the most is Muriel and DMH.

Somebody tell me this is really happening! I mean, if Golden Bachelor is a thing, then surely this sixty-something can date a younger man. (I’m guessing… she doesn’t look sixty, but she does spend a lot of time with the sewing circle.)

They aren’t the only ones who might finally get together. Things are looking pretty good for Max Medina… I mean, Mike.

First of all, Brie and her mom generously let him hang out.

Naturally, he says…

So, they gather around the TV to watch some seriously scintillating coverage of the fire on the news. And unlike Mike, this newscaster is having a seriously tough day. Why is she broadcasting outside? And is she contractually obligated to wear her hair down no matter the circumstances?

Then Brie gives Max, wait… no, Mike, a legit compliment.

Because the thing is, Max’s Mike’s mom wanted him to be a dentist.

Just kidding… he wanted to be a cop. And he’s suuuuuper good at it!

Now, I am not saying Mike and Max are destined to the same fate of being seriously brokenhearted, but I feel it’s just not in the cards for these two.

Sorry, but I have to insist that just as Max could never compete with Luke, Mike can never compete with Brady.

Brady fought fires. In prison.

If Mike has one thing going for him it’s that Brie’s mom is a big fan. And when she is obsessed with something, she makes it exceedingly clear.

It’s funny to me because she doesn’t even mention Adam and the whole falling-off-the-roof incident. It’s like Adam ever even existed.

Anyway, Jack is strong. This morning, he helped Brady evacuate his camp, and then he raced into a building farmhouse and rescued Ava. Then — in the middle of trying to save his restaurant from a fire — Hope enlists him for another mission.

I mean, has this dude even had a sip of water today?

Anyway, he’s off to get Charlie (who?) to fly a plane (what?) to put out the fires (okay) because they weren’t able to convince someone to do something… I don’t even know.

Spoiler alert: hearing from the mayor didn’t work. And why didn’t it work? Because VR is not more important than any other town. Stop being so damn self-involved, Virgin River.

Anyway, Jack, who is, again, in the middle of trying to be save his restaurant — takes off for a visit to Hope’s spurned paramour.

So, he’s not really into this mission until Jack talks him into it.

But because plot, Charlie can’t fly the plane. Thank God Jack can!

Never forget: Jack CAN fly.

Meanwhile, Kaia shows up to save Jack’s.

Ha. #neverletthemseeyousweat

Unfortunately, Kaia’s arrival does not signal a fiery reunion for these lovers. Instead, Preacher is about to get a pretty big surprise.

Just kidding… that’s not the surprise. We already knew Brady had a heart of gold. (Wait, is Brady the Golden Bachelor?)

Kaia’s married! But we all know why she didn’t tell him.

Let’s just start with the obvious: this ep is a real bummer. You’ve got your sexual assault allegations; your miscarriages; your insensitive mothers.

Yeah, this one was rough. I guess the writers and Melissa agreed:

Actually, I think she’s got a pretty good plan here to burn Emerald Lumber to the ground and collect the insurance money. Then Brady could move on with his life and not have to worry about rocks being thrown through Brie’s windows.

The important thing to remember here is Brady isn’t a bad guy, he’s just a guy trapped in a bad situation. Which is why the writers are working overtime to remind us that Brady is actually A HERO. And that is why this happens:

Why is this Jack’s job? Didn’t the camp people once kidnap Jack and Mel???

Yep… [Checks notes] Season 1, episode 5.

And what makes Brady such a great number two for this job? Did he live up there or something?

Anyway, Brady obvs asks zero questions (which is probably how he ended up working for Calvin in the first place) and follows Jack up to the weed encampment.

The props people were also working really hard on this episode because we get a lot of set design to illustrate just how dangerous this mission is. First of all, these people have guns. (And tons of PVC piping because???)

Secondly, they pledge allegiance to pot.

Jack tries desperately to convince them to leave. And I know you can’t see it so you’re gonna have to take my word for it: the caption above is Jack talking. The pot people aren’t persuaded that Jack has their best interest at heart, but Brady, on the other hand, knows how to win them over.

This works! Because Brady is A HERO. (Note the distinct differences in his appeal and Jack’s.)

Thank God Brady came along. And — to put a finer point on it — he also saves a child. And then we get a reference to the fact that he’s a veteran!

See, he’s super outstanding. Sorry for all the drugs he accidentally brought into VR. (Wait, is this why the pot people like him?)

Meanwhile back in town/fire HQ, everyone hates Nick because he’s not Hope.

I truly felt bad for Nick because while he is trying his hardest to deal with an emergency situation — after, what, two days on the job? — everyone spends the whole ep just taking shots at him.

So Hope is on her own mission to execute the plan as she sees fit. She also takes some time to pal around with Preacher.

Big news: Preacher does know the firefighter’s name (Kaia)!

He has a crush on her, but he’s worried she might not like him back.Who wrote this episode, a third grader? Why is Preacher’s confidence soooooooo low? He’s never had anyone show this much interest in him!

*Sigh* I am starting to think Preacher is really the Luke Danes of this show.

Anyway, after Hope tells him to go for it, he makes a really grand gesture.

And you thought romance was dead.

Meanwhile, Mel is volunteering at the clinic because of the fire. Honestly, Mel works more since she resigned than she did all of last season. Anyway, she’s quickly getting to know what Muriel brings to the team.

And having so many extra hands is giving Doc some time to work on his comedy.

Let’s not forget that he’s talking to a grown man impaled by a tree. Anyway, it’s a rough day for everybody, and I spent this whole episode thinking two things:

1. Where are these people’s protective masks? They are inhaling a ton of smoke!
2. Why isn’t anybody giving anybody a hug?

For example, Mike shows up at the courthouse, and Brie is clearly having a TERRIBLE day.

Why doesn’t he hug this poor woman?

And Mel is clearly losing it. Why doesn’t Muriel hug her instead of trying to feed her?

And Liddy is really struggling. Why doesn’t Lizzie hug her?

Preacher is worried about getting his heart broken again. Why doesn’t Hope hug him?

Why doesn’t anybody show anyone just a little bit of affection?! Kaia is pretty much the only person showing she’s got feelings for anybody!

Even poor Nick, who’s right in the end, doesn’t even get a nod of encouragement. He does get Hope with this sick burn.

Yikes, I hope Vern gives her a hug later.

What an awful day.

Yes! This is the episode I have been waiting for… all of the things that have been set up so far this season are finally, finally paying off, starting with the cliffhanger at the end of the last ep.

And the answer is: YES! Jack’s not letting his baby mama sleep on the cold, hard floor of the forest, though he is taking her to the remotest spot possible.

Yep, makes total sense that you would want to be somewhere with zero reception during your high-risk pregnancy. And Jack, being an absolute romantic, uses this getaway to remind Mel of some of the high points of their relationship.

Yep, remember the last time these two lovebirds got out of town? Don’t worry: the drama of this getaway is just as salient as last time because there’s about to be a huge twist!

THEY AREN’T THE ONLY ONES OUT HERE!

I love everything about this storyline. First of all, we have these two dudes letting their kids run around this super remote campsite, which is also right beside a pretty fast-moving body of water.

Then they both go to collect firewood even though they complain to Mel:

The kids come looking for Mel and Jack because in this town any adult can be a trusted babysitter. (I mean, remember how Vince just watched Christopher for all that time?)

Finally, the trunk to their van is open THE ENTIRE TIME Mel and Jack are there but they still have enough battery to leave before daybreak the next morning. #mustbeahybrid

But the best part of this story is that it gives Mel and Jack an opportunity to have their first substantive conversation about parenting.

This makes zero sense to me because wasn’t parenting the reason they broke up in the first place??? Didn’t he end it with her because he was overwhelmed by the idea of supporting two families?

*Sigh*… okay.

I guess if there’s one thing Preacher has taught me anything this season, it’s that sometimes it’s better not to talk.

HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW HER NAME!

That said, I’m pretty pumped this chick is back. She also didn’t get the MP treatment.

Preacher, as per usual, is just being too damn much.

This woman didn’t even tell you her name, Preach. Calm down.

Also being too much: Muriel.

She is at work ON HER DAY OFF having a spontaneous sing-along with Doc McHottie (henceforth to be known as DMH). Am I the only one sensing vibes between these to?

Also, Mike clearly still has feels for Brie. Convenient that we haven’t seen Mike until now even though this town is still riddled with fentanyl. I guess he’s been busy not investigating Vince’s claims that his brother was murdered — no reason to follow up on that — or Burt’s contact exposure.

It’s sweet that Mike has been recalling some of his favorite times with Brie.

Let’s look back, shall we.

The time they visited Brady’s bail bondsman so Brie could charm the secretary.

The time they both watched Brady interogate Calvin. (I still don’t understand this.)

The time they watched a man die in an explosion in front of them.

Anyway, Brie hasn’t had much time to reminisce.

Have we EVER once seen Brie go to work? Please, someone tell me how she affords her home and stylish clothes.

The only person in this episode who is actually doing any work is Lizzie, which is shocking based on her work ethic from the past few seasons.

And then she bounced off to flirt with Brady!

Why doesn’t anyone talk about this?! It was like two weeks ago in VR time…

Anyway, Hope is cankerous as usual.

Ha! I’m glad Hope is getting back to her old self. And just in time because Connie has a little surprise up her sleeve: a spa day!

This whole thing is just delightful! And who knew there were also hot springs in VR?

The best part is JE shows up and does the best stage whisper I have EVER heard.

This sets the tables for the showdown we have been waiting for: JE vs Hope re. mayor. [Ding! Ding!]

Funny, I have never gotten the sense that Nick is anything other than an affable millionaire with money to burn who can officiate a wedding or fund a business with next to no notice.

What I love about this storyline is not just the literal mudslinging, but the fact that we got a brand new set. I’m glad to see they’re keeping it fresh this season.

Wait, make that two new sets!

Things are really booming in VR because now they have shady docks for making off-the-record deals. Anyway Brady has decided that reluctant drug smuggler isn’t his ideal career because he finally had time to flip through a copy of “What Color is Your Parachute.” So, it’s time to come clean… again.

I feel like Mike of all people should already know this given Jeb just died from an overdose at Emerald Lumber like yesterday, but oooookay.

To which Mike says:

Yeah, remember the raid that Brady planned but also missed? Also, what are the rules on being a CI — is it NOT like a double jeopardy situation where you can’t do it again for the same thing?

Mike is totally not into this idea at all until he finds out what’s at stake: Brie’s life!

So I guess we’re doing this… again.

And we have another fire:

*Sigh* Jack’s house — did he ever get any insurance money? — literally burnt down in the season three premiere.

Is fire the only disaster they can come up with? Maybe they have have a lot of leftover pyrotechnics from Calvin’s boat exploding…

I want to get riled up about this repeating, I really do, but in this case I think it’s better to just be like Preacher and sit back and enjoy. 😉

Well, let’s start with the biggest bomb this episode dropped:

NICK IS THE MAYOR! Nick “don’t-ask-where-all-my-money- comes-from” is in charge of all of VR! How are the people not freaking out? Who voted for Nick?

And even worse, his sister is a drug-dealing shark who’s about to get her hooks into Jack’s business!

This is a real bummer because Jack has a lot of plans for his glamping business, and I don’t think the business plan included fentanyl.

Jack came to this conclusion after talking to his old friend, Barry. J/K, Barry is his therapist! (Nice to see they didn’t do Barry like they did M/P and he’s still around.)

Now, the decision to see Barry wasn’t based on Charmaine’s recent disclosure. No, there was pretty much no mention of Char this ep. Instead, it was perpetuated by a nightmare about Jack’s brother falling off the roof. (Did you forget he had a brother who died? Funny how he and Brie NEVER talk about this, but I guess that’s what Barry is for.)

Anyway, Barry wants Jack to get out and be one with nature. Luckily, Denny — who you will remember is an avid outdoorsman — is headed out for a little rock climb!

And Denny just happens to have everything Jack needs to rock climb in his car already including special rock climbing shoes that magically fit this man. So even though Jack has zero training, there is no reason for them not to climb a super-high mountain without so much as a beginner’s knot-tying class.

This is absolutely a starter course in rock climbing.

Also getting out into nature: Mel.

Apparently, she’s got a new side gig working for the VR Chamber of Commerce.

She and Cameron are still struggling to get along because he’s not #teamjack.

Muriel could not be less interested in this. She’s only here for one thing.

Let’s not forget the other mentions of food in this episode:

These sandwiches are actually a HUGE plot point; they are the reason Preacher finally gets some action. And the best part is, he doesn’t even learn this woman’s name.

Does this strike anyone as even slightly out of character for Preacher or is it just me?

The one guy who’s sticking true to form, it seems, is Brady, who never told Brie how Jeb died.

Okay, this is incredibly sad — poor, Pauline! — but WHY AREN’T THE FEDS INVESTIGATING EMERALD LUMBER? (And why is Pauline out shopping for tomatoes immediately following her husband’s funeral?) Anyway, a quick recap on EL:

The last guy running the place died in a legit explosion.

The guy currently running the place just finished a stint in jail (wrongfully accused of murder, but still…)

Also — checks notes — that guy IS THE ONLY GUY who wasn’t arrested when the place was raided last time.

Now an employee just OD’d, and the person who reported the drug-related death is the same guy who wasn’t at that last raid… in which they were looking for drugs.

Remember this? It was very official because of the jackets.

I’m just gonna say it: #justice4jeb

Anyway, Brady confesses to all this smuggling business when Brie confronts him.

It’s pretty disappointing given he set up this whole outdoor movie extravaganza at her new place and now he doesn’t even get any popcorn. Plus he’s usually working nights since that’s the best time to sneak in the drugs, so this is doubly upsetting.

Worst of all, it seems Mel was wrong: You CAN have a bad day in Virgin River.

Here’s a question I legitimately have to ask myself sometimes: What is this show even about? What is the central tension? Is it a workplace drama about the stresses of being an undervalued employee?

Is it about the road to redemption?

And if so, when is it going to be over?

No, no, no. This show, dear reader, I would like to propose is actually about the life-changing magic of FOOD. And as evidence for this theory, I present this episode:

You’ve got sandwich convos.

Lollipops.

A whole bunch of excitement about coffee!

And a lot of glee about some macaroni & cheese.

Now, in the normal world, this episode would be about one thing: PAIGE! How is that not being discussed? How is she just a footnote at this point? For a town that apparently loooooooooves gossip, everyone has moved on from the mysterious single mother who just rolled into town yesterday (yesterday!!!) to pick up the kid she left behind. (And I’m sorry, but is Vince not even getting a trial? Doesn’t she have to make a statement???)

Even Preacher is just kicking it today. And what’s he thinking about? FOOD.

You’re telling me this man couldn’t take a single day off to process M/P & Christopher leaving town?! Or double-check that grave sight to make sure Wes is still hidden away for good? Nope, he’s back at work, but he has made up his mind about one thing.

Done with dating?! He went out with Julia like once.

Anyway, this is a pretty heartbreaking revelation because Preach is ready to put a ring on it.

Yeah, well, Preacher, you haven’t exactly proven to be great at finding stuff. Maybe you should try, I don’t know… online dating?

Also, isn’t this town full of single ladies on the prowl? Wasn’t that what we were led to believe when McDreamy came to work at the clinic?

Wait, sorry… wrong show. Remember the waiting room FULL OF WOMEN last season (i.e. eight weeks ago).

And why were they all here? Nope, not because the clinic was handing out COVID boosters.

Do these same women NOT EAT AT JACK’S? It’s the only dining establishment in town. *Sigh*

Okay, thankfully Bree is here to give Preach an ego boost.

Come on — this guy is way cuter than Cameron. Amiright?

Anyway, Bree’s not the only one giving out pep talks. Char’s also feeling a little bad about herself because she has an on-again, off-again relationship with the truth. Thankfully, Doc is there to tell her to #shakeitoff. (I’m sure Char is gonna bounce right back from this little oopsie.)

Denny — who, BTW, was this close to being high school class president — is also handing out some helpful advice.

I’ve never seen Denny look more intense or committed to something. This is a real switch from when we first met him.

That said, the real MVP of this episode is Brady’s new BFF, Jeb. It’s really good to see Brady out there connecting with people again. He really hasn’t made any friends since prison.

This episode was honestly the happiest I’ve seen Brady look in a long time!

It’s really too bad that Brady didn’t tell Jeb that the first rule of drug smuggling is that you shouldn’t do any of the drugs. (So far, he’s not great at running this operation, is he?) (RIP, Jeb.) Maybe Michelle should try recruiting Muriel to take over Emerald Lumber — she’s got a real can-do attitude.

Now, I know I’ve proven I am not a lawyer, but is she allowed to just DO THAT? Isn’t that a HIPPA violation?

Oh, who cares. She made coffee! See, magic.

I’ll be honest — I don’t remember that much of last season. Thank God that while an entire year has passed for us viewers, only a few minutes have passed in the VR universe. But the clouds gathering on the horizon are an ominous reminder that season four ended with many, many cliffhangers.

Now, I fully expected we would be opening on a cabin — Mel and Jack’s cabin that is, because let’s not forget that Jack’s place burned down. (That man has extraordinarily bad luck.) But no, we are headed straight to the heart of the action: the cabin where Chef/Secret Agent Preacher has just rescued Paige/Michelle from Wes/Vince! And thankfully, we are getting some exposition in case we forgot what this storyline is all about.

Oh no, this is exactly what Paige/Michelle was afraid of — it’s why she spent all that time hiding. Her cover I officially blown!

Oh, never mind. Apparently no one investigates accusations of murder made by criminals. Phew!

Looks like these two can finally get their happy ending. *squee*

Because, as Jack reminds us:

Yeah, Preach has done a lot for M/P. Let’s look back on some of the highlights of their relationship.

How much money does this man make at Jack’s? Never mind… The point is, this day is off to a pretty awesome start! By the time the opening credits roll, we know we’ve in for a bright, sunny day.

First, Julia is crushing it at work when he boyfriend swings by.

Wait, make that ex-boyfriend.

And Brady got a promotion, though he maybe doesn’t understand all the rules and responsibilities of his new role.

Cameron, on the other hand, is very clear on what he will and won’t be doing at the office.

Lizzie’s also starting a new job today as Hope’s aide. First order of business is breakfast.

#girlboss

Good thing she’s here though, because Hope is ready to go back to work as town mayor. (Did you remember she’s the mayor? Neither did I.) Anyway, there’s a town meeting coming up.

Yep, that’s the one, and the agenda needs HELP.

Good thing Lizzie is here to lend her skills.

Meanwhile, Jack is relaxing having recently learned

How does he really feel about this?

Anyway, that whole saga is defs over, so we can just forget about that and move on to more important things, like Christopher’s “natural” hair color.

And Bree’s new address!

But before she goes, she has a little business to take care of.

And naturally, the first step to pressing charges is calling a friend in the DA’s office, who acts as an audience surrogate.

Wait, who?

Don is seriously up to no good.

I really don’t understand how the law works in this show. Wouldn’t that be considered witness tampering?

Well, at least Bree has nothing to worry about now except moving into her brand new house!

She also took a minute to send out a quickie change of address notice. It was nice of her to notify her old boss that she’s moved now. And he responded in kind with a little housewarming gift.

Welcome to the neighborhood.

How is it already time for the season finale of Virgin River? In the timeline of the show it’s been, what, six weeks? And so much happened! (Remember, Jack and Mel almost died in a plane crash?) But the finale had no shortage of cliffhangers and brand-new developments.

First of all, baby Mack is Jack’s!

This great news comes immediately after Mel and Jack’s engagement, which further solidifies the fact that they are #meanttobe. Buuuuuut, not everyone in town agrees.

In case you haven’t been paying attention, the writers remind us time and time again why Cam’s not happy. Cameron has some thoughts about Jack.

And…

So, naturally, Cameron IS QUITTING HIS JOB! (Did he not sign a contract ala Brie???)

Well, Jack says that distance can be a good thing.

Which explains why Preacher is skulking around in the woods playing action hero again. Paige is #endgame for Preacher and they have been apart for waaaaaaay too long.

At least he called Connie this time.

This time, he also finds time to call for back-up, which makes no sense because he’s not a cop, he’s a CHEF. Isn’t back-up just for, you know, police?

But since Vince has a gun this time, the threat is MUCH more serious.

I have to marvel at the fact that Vince is riding around on an ATV with a gun. Where are he and Paige coming from?

Anyway, after running errands, Vince gets right back to the task at hand — avenging his TWIN brother.

Now, I realize Christopher told us Vince was suffering some sort of psychotic break, but I really don’t understand how Vince is going about this whole thing. First, he tried to kill Jack because he wanted to find Preacher. Then he kidnapped his nephew for EIGHT WEEKS to get his sister-in-law to come out of hiding, even though she didn’t know her son was missing. Now he’s kidnapped her so he could figure out what happened to his twin brother. For a police detective, this seems like the most ridiculous, most roundabout way to solve this mystery. But, I guess he’s not thinking straight. *Shoulder shrug*

Poor Paige! If only she’d gotten better advice from the legal aid people. If only someone could have helped! Seems like if a couple of high schoolers could pull THIS off, Brie and Mike could have come up with SOMETHING.

Too bad this show isn’t called “Virgin Riverdale.”

Anyway, Preacher just kicks in the door and wins the day.

Mic drooooooooooop! Plot resolution! I have been waiting months for us to circle back to this body!!!!!!

I guess this is Paige and Preacher’s happy ending? (Sorry, Julia.) I’m trying to imagine them explaining how they met:

You know, it’s a classic girl was living under a false name after fleeing from her abusive ex who she accidentally murder, and boy graciously offered to hide the body (*squee!*) and babysit while girl was on the run. But then girl has to trade herself for her kid’s freedom because guy got roofied and the kid got kidnapped. But then guy just kicks in the door and confesses to murder. Classic love story!

Maybe Nick can officiate their wedding!

Speaking of Nick, he and JE are taking Mel and Jack out to celebrate their engagement. And Nick is letting everybody know he. is. loaded!

And — not weird at all — he invited his sister to join the celebration.

Did you hear that? Melissa Montgomery, aka Brady’s new boss lady! You know, I am starting to think Nick is rich because DRUG MONEY!!!!!!!

Unfortunately, Jack and Mel never have a chance to ask Melissa that classic icebreaker question, “So, what do you do for a living?” Because Jack gets an urgent call from Charmaine, who’s having a really rough day.

Yeah, Todd is garbage and is definitely cheating. And now she’s scared she’s gonna lose the babies because she told a terrible lie.

Well, at least now Jack doesn’t have to have to worry about custody issues with Mark’s mom OR Char and Todd. Whew. But he is still gonna have to make that Airstream business work because they are about to be a single-income family.

Sometimes I just feel like Preacher is on a different show than the rest of the cast.

Like, he’s sneaking around in the woods with ZEEEEEEERO BACK-UP to confront a kidnapper/attempted killer while everybody else is just chillin’.

Denny and Lizzie: makin’ signs and chillin’.

Sewing circle ladies: gossipin’ and chillin’.

Jack: glampin’ and chillin’.

Mel and her new bestie: going to lunch and chillin’.

Does anybody else even know Paige/Michelle is back in town???? Apparently not, because everybody — besides Preacher — is chillin’.

Okay, so Paige is back and she’s come home to find out some terrible news! Preacher met someone else! Wait, no… that’s not it.

Um… rewind: she hasn’t made any effort to get an update on her kid in EIGHT WEEKS? (I’m assuming it’s been eight weeks based on Mel’s pregnancy…) This just seems absurd. Especially when she wasn’t that far away.

But okay, I’ve never been in this situation, and I imagine that sometimes when you’re busy evading law enforcement and maintaining your fake identity and wondering where your not-ex buried your husband’s body and hoping his TWIN brother doesn’t find you, you forget to check in on the little things, like your child. Good thing Preacher — and his TWO private investigators and Connie are on the case.

Seriously, he didn’t even call Connie to go with him to look for Christopher??? #rude

And Preacher could have really used some help because all he finds are… SKETCHES! (Also, Christopher couldn’t tell Preacher any details about where he was, but HE DREW THE CABIN???)

All this sneaking around/binocular use turns out to be for nothing because Paige SET HIM UP!

And this after he was double-crossed by her friend!

Is Preacher just impossibly gullible??? (Or Paige’s agent just couldn’t get her a deal to come back for a fifth season?)

I love that this whole storyline is essentially resolved with a carpool. #greenplanet

Why does Paige agree to go with Vince? What kind of legal advice did she get in Mendicino because this seems like the opposite of what a GOOD lawyer would tell you to do…

If only they knew a lawyer or a cop who could have maybe helped with this situation! Maybe a lawyer and cop who’ve worked together in the past and could have set up some sort of sting to catch Vince. (Especially since his DNA was found at a crime scene.) I mean, I’m just brainstorming here, but what if there was, maybe a sassy lady lawyer who’s cute and perky.

And a big city cop who’s always well-dressed and eating.

I don’t know. It’d just be nice to see something like that…