After that wild movie night, it’s time for the mayor to shift her attention back to her primary duty.
That’s right — the mayor is not only officiating the wedding, she’s also the official wedding planner. And naturally, her chief-of-staff is here to ensure everything discussed in today’s meeting is accurately documented.
Is Lizzie’s mom happy that her daughter skipped college to have a baby with a dying man and take notes at a wedding planning meeting?
This meeting sets an important tone for the episode, because everyone has business to attend to since the wedding is in two weeks.
I really appreciate all the time cues we are getting this season.
I also appreciate the writers working overtime to remind us of the stakes this episode. Everyone needs to be super sure of the person they are going to go to this wedding with.
First couple: Mel and Jack (aka. the bride and groom)
Now, lest we ever, ever, ever forget, we have a tidy little reminder that Mel was married before.
But it’s cool because her ex is dead. No baggage there.
And Jack was married before.
You know, I really thought the writers forgot about this the same way they forgot about Adam (RIP). But no, they managed to make an entire episode about this. And so, off the royals go!
Okay, in case it’s not clear, Jack was SUPS young when he got married so it didn’t count.
And also, his ex, a non-threatening brunette, has zero feelings for him and has absolutely gone to therapy about this whole thing.
Honestly, this is a pretty f-ed up thing to do to someone who you just married. Especially when you going to get into on-campus married housing. That sh*t is not easy to come by.
Second couple: Hope and Vernon (surrogate parents of the bride and groom)
Vernon was supposed to walk Mel down the aisle, but then he got demoted, which is probably just as well considering this whole drilling-into-someone’s-head-without-authorization mess he’s gotten himself into.
Meanwhile, Hope has to visit her barn-owning ex, who was clearly emotionally abusive.
This is incredibly uncomfortable, and I absolutely hate this for Hope. But what are you gonna do when you have a homeless horse? Anyway, she should definitely go to the wedding with Vernon, not Roland.
Third couple: Brady and Lark
Actually, it looks like these two won’t be carpooling to the wedding together. Brady does not even care that Lark has an excuse for trying to scam him and sends her packing.
He just wanted to get over Lark by getting under Brie (ha!). Sadly though, he still has so many old mementos hanging around.
We all remember the significance of this tiara.
(Guys, I still think Lark started the fire. Is anyone even going to follow up on my hunch???)
Fourth couple: Preacher and Kaia
These two are totally solid, not just because but also mostly and absolutely because they are the only Black people in the main cast. But Kaia is a little distracted this episode because Brady has feelings for Brie (shock!) and Kaia, his new bostie (bestie + boss — you get it) knows. And now poor Kaia has a REAL BIG SECRET to keep. 🤫
She’s taking this whole thing pretty hard, which is odd considering she is works in the field of emergency management and just finished watching her BF go on trial for the body her firefighters found in the woods, but oooooooookay.
Fifth couple: Mike and Brie
These two are doing great. First, he still doesn’t know she cheated on him. Second,
A promotion to what, you ask?
Now, I find this odd because like Brie, Mike doesn’t appear to ever be at work, and also, when he is working, his work seems pretty patchy. Remember the whole unofficial-undercover-boat-explosion operation he ran? Also, shouldn’t the persecution have called him to the stand in Preacher’s trial? Just sayin’.
Anyway, I am going to go ahead and say that this promotion is likely going to coincide with a breakup. It’s only a matter of time before Brie and Brady get back together.
Sixth couple: Muriel and Cameron.
Okay, I am just hoping beyond hope these two get back together. He’s clearly been going through something since he left. I mean, look at this COVID beard!
So, grab your date and get ready for the event of the century!
Guys, sorry, sorry, sorry, I was running to get to my computer as fast as I could after watching this week’s ep, and I dropped all my notes.
No, Rory, I’ve got it. There was A LOT of new stuff in this episode, I swear. Let’s see… as if this week in VR couldn’t get any more exciting, it’s movie night!
Whoops, sorry about that… I do have my notes, I swear! Just so I don’t get lost again, let’s do a quick recap of the past few days: Monday, kid in a sink hole.
Tuesday: murder case without witnesses. Wednesday: exoneration!
Then yesterday, it was finally time for VR’s royal couple to take their place in the pantheon and be celebrated by the commoners with a bachelor/bachelorette party.
Uh, sorry… I just need to pause here and point out was on a THURSDAY NIGHT. A Thursday. Because nothing says let’s get wild like a Thursday. But, it was nuts! How nuts, you say? Welllllllll, one person got really smashed at the party and called their ex!
Oh, sorry… wrong ex.
Now it’s Friday (TGIF!) and it’s movie night in Stars Hollow VR! But there’s a problem. (No, not another sinkhole!)
Hope has to go and petition the person in charge to change it.
Sorry, wrong guy.
But, look, there are only so many options for a town movie night.
Gah — again! Why does this keep happening?
Anyway, while this movie night drama is playing out, everyone who was invited to the Thursday night bachelor(ette) parties (sorry, Lizzie) has to go to work.
BAHAHAHAAHA! I never get sick of Brie going to “work.” Also, don’t you get time off after single-handedly winning a massive case? (I’m asking for a friend.)
Anyway, Brie’s gotta get back in the saddle (see what I did there, cowboy?) and go down to the prison for [checks notes] plot point. And she sees something truly unsettling.
It’s Lark and that one guy!
But also, Kaia has to get up and go to work. And, it’s that one guy!
Boy, these two #girlbosses have a lot to deal with today. And, eye-roll, because if I’d been out dancing the night before, am I seriously dealing with casual workplace sexual harassment today?
Oh wait [checks notes], there was no dancing — it was karaoke and ax-throwing.
Dang, sorry… wrong show AGAIN.
Also, how old are these women, because I’m extremely tired if I stay up past 10 PM writing these recaps, so it’s hard to imagine how they would be functioning normally today.
Anyway, Preacher is off from chef duty today (I guess the restaurant is just closed 🤷🏾♀️) because he has community service.
Oops, sorry… hang on!
How great is it that the DA not only sentenced Preacher to community service, but they found a way for him to volunteer with his ride or die!
This is awesome because this way he doesn’t have to interact with a bunch of other convicted felons the way Lark does.
Well, my point is Thursday night is a strange night to have a wild party, and now everyone just has to drag themselves out of bed and back to work/community service. Except for Mel and Jack, who have unlimited PTO. So, the royals are having lunch with Jack’s incredibly supportive father.
(It’s nice that Jack’s dad took him to a Men’s Warehouse on a boat to buy this suit.)
And Mel’s new dad comes along for the fun.
Between you and me, I think Everett is right: this is a lot. He’s known this woman for twelve weeks, and she’s all “Walk me down the aisle”; “Meet my sister on my wedding day”; “Play that song you wrote for my mom”; “Come hiking with me”; “Let me keep you alive.” Seriously, Mel, back off a little.
Anyway, Mel and Jack deal with their daddy issues, Kaia and Brie handle some business closer to home.
Kaia puts Roy in his place. (I’m sorry, is there NO HR in this town?)
While Brie tells Brady the awful truth about his romance with Lark.
Now, before we talk about what happens next, I’m begging: could someone please explain to me what “this entire time” is? Like, when did this rouse begin???
Let’s look at the timeline, shall we? (Since the weather rarely changes in California, I’ll have to use some of the events to denote the passage of time.)
Outdoor (backyard) movie/boat explosion season
Brady is dating Brie. Then they break up because he’s an unofficial undercover informant for the, er, um, undisclosed law enforcement group with whom he does not seem to have a contract.
Hero season
A “devastating” fire breaks out, and Brady saves a little girl named Hazel from the pot camp.
Remember this hot action?
And then Brady ends up housing Lark at the local fentanyl suites glamping site, which is then seized by the FBI. (Question: What’s the FBI’s process for reimbursing landowners when the land is purchased using an investment from a drug lady and her brother/the former town mayor who no one liked?)
Post wildfires, pre-Christmas
Lark makes her move!
Two-part Christmas special/paternity reveal season
Brie and Brady have both moved on. Lark makes a suspicious phone call.
TIME JUMP!!!! / sinkhole season
Brady + Lark = 4eva… maybe.
Brady gets a nice little insurance check because he owned (?) the lumberyard (again: JUSTICE FOR JEB!!) and he has pretty good renter’s insurance I guess.
Yesterday / bachelor party season
Lark’s mum is sick; Brady starts to think something is suss.
Today / outdoor movie season
Brady learns his relationship is just insurance fraud.
By my calculation, given its outdoor movie season AGAIN, this has been a year in the making, which begs a few questions:
At what point did the scam start?
Did Lark “lose” Hazel in the fire just to ensnare Brady?
Why did Lark’s baby daddy have her go after Brady?
How did Lark know who Brady even was? (I know his hero status is town-wide, but do they have photos of him on billboards or something??)
Why didn’t anybody throw Hazel a birthday party? Like, something small with just her & maybe Christopher & sinkhole kid? That would have been nice.
How on earth did Lark and her prison paramour know Brady would get insurance money?
Guys, just a theory, but I THINK LARK STARTED THE FIRE!
Cue the music…
J/K, VR would NEVER pay for the rights to such expensive music.
But you know what they will pay for? Elbow patches on a sweater!
Okay, this is a great look with the yellowing tree in the background. Great work, set design and costume people. Chef’s kiss all around! But also, isn’t it April… so, why is this tree changing colors?
And this conveniently brings us to the climax of this episode.
Brie tells Brady that he’s worthy of love, and also, she never really liked Mike because we all know he’s the Max Medina of the show.
Fresh off of Preacher’s trial, everyone has decided to turn their attention to Mel and Jack, VR’s royal couple, lest we forget. And the writers have decided to serve up the wildest, craziest night we have EVER seen!
Brie and Kaia, Mel’s nearest and dearest, are throwing her a bachelorette party.
Joey’s flying in for the big day out, which is awesome because these sisters have a lot to catch up on. Like how Mel is getting to know her real father.
This seems like a weird time to meet your sister’s dad. Like, there will be NO OTHER OPPORTUNITIES to introduce these two people? Doesn’t Joey live within driving distance???
Well, whatever… Mel’s got it all under control. Good thing, too, because this bachelorette party is about to be wild: just look at the boas!
Brie and Kaia are feeling flirty tonight! Brie is hot and heavy for Mike, which is good because they have been having a hard time since her closing argument at Preacher’s trial (yesterday?).
If she can just distract him with sex, she won’t ever have to talk about her emotions. Who would want an emotionally intelligent bf anyway?
Meanwhile, Kaia wants to talk town hotties. She’s really trying to forge a bond with Brie by letting her know she thinks Brie’s ex is cute.
I find this to be a really concerning way to describe YOUR CO-WORKER…
But I guess Kaia and Cameron went to the same mandatory HR training program.
Anyway, these ladies are out for a whole night of “fun.” Mel is excited to FINALLY bring her two worlds together:
This is not okay. It will NEVER be okay.
And things are about to get crrrrrrrrrrrrrrazy!
Wait, sorry, wrong cultural moment.
This is the kind of wild night that could only be enacted by Messy Mel!
We are definitely familiar with these party personas! They’re soooooo crazy! So, no surprise when Mel really sticks it to a karaoke heckler(?) in classic Messy Mel fashion:
The heckler responds with a sick burn!
What matters here is Mel has TWO friends and one SISTER. Don’t get it twisted!
Meanwhile, Jack has a whole battalion of battle buddies who have come to town to celebrate his impending nuptials. And this was 100% written by a man who has BEEN TO A BACHELOR PARTY.
Unfortunately, Jack and Preacher have to have the same conversation with these dudes that *I* have to have with my children every time we are at Chili’s.
I say:
And then my partner closes with:
Parenting is so hard. No wonder Lizzie — still livin’ that PSA life — is unhappy. First of all, sometimes people have the nerve to send you perfectly practical stuff for your postpartum period instead of cute onesies!
And since plot, she naturally turns to Rick to share her concerns.
Like Mel, this poor woman has no friends. The only social circle in this town is +50. But, because this is a wild night, we need to underline the fact that these ladies are still seeing plenty of action!
I fully appreciate how horny this show lets women be… right up until they get pregnant.
Also, if THIS happens on SATC, I can only imagine what happens in VR when you talk about who you’ve slept with:
Unless you’re JE, who has only ever been with Nick.
Anyway, because “drunk” Brie and “drunk” Kaia “forgot” to cancel, a “stripper” walks into the bar. And without any hesitation, the sewing circle volunteers to accept this incredible performance.
I LOVE all the crossovers this season.
And as if we aren’t having enough rollicking fun, Jack offers up his own striptease. Please, enjoy this series of images as much as I did.
Drunk Mel:
Sober Jack:
Still sober:
Still sober!
I’m just trying to imagine the director of this scene giving directions. Anyway…
I’m sooooooooo pleased that the VR writers are FINALLY back to their usual antics. Don’t get me wrong — the first two episodes of this season were fine. They were FINE. But I’m not here for time jumps or scintillating legal procedurals. I’m here for SINKHOLES!
So, let me back up for a second. This town has endured its fair share of disasters: There was Jack’s cabin burning to the ground. The drug raid gone wrong. Calvin’s boat explosion. Another fire. And another drug bust. So, it’s understandable that they would really need something, anything to rally around. And that something is A WEDDING.
This is exactly what every bride-to-be wants to hear. So, no pressure, but…
Cue the Lorde music.
Just kidding… the producers aren’t paying for the rights to this music, especially not when they are spending so much money on making this season a crossover with Firefly Lane.
The flashbacks in these past two episodes have truly been a gold mine. We don’t just get to see Mel’s mom and biological dad in the past, we also get to see lil’ Burt!
And 60s Connie — who still has the same haircut. And the same attitude.
Most moving, perhaps, has been learning that Mel’s parents’ meet cute inspired the film, Serendipity.
Turns out, there’s only way to truly know if you’re meant to be with someone if you’re a free-spirited heterosexual with beach waves.
And then, we get the most moving exchange/birth story.
Um, ick. Sorry, Everett, but this is the very definition of TMI.
Also, I don’t think Hope would be happy to know that Mel is wasting her time on these anecdotes when they have a wedding to plan!!!
Apparently, officiating a wedding also means planning the wedding. And strong-arming the bride into making it a town-wide event.
Anyway, it’s a good thing the wedding isn’t for a few more days (weeks?) because they want to make sure Preacher is free. He’s a little tied up being in court for 48 hours, but thankfully this is only a two-day case. And Brie’s crack legal time has figured out how to stop the prosecution from insisting that Preacher was somehow responsible for Wes’s death: putting him on the stand. GENIUS!
Weirdly, the DA doesn’t bother to call Vince to the stand — seems like he might have an important perspective given he spent months trying to find his brother.
But, Mike already assured us this would be a non-issue.
That’s why Mike’s on the legal team!
Anyway, Brie uses the best argument in town to make the case for the defense:
Case closed.
And not to be out-rivaled, Brady quickly volunteers to get dropped into a sinkhole.
Now, sinkholes are dangerous, but with the right preparation, you can handle them.
Flawless logic here.
Also, sinkholes are fun!
Because Muriel, there haven’t been any catastrophes in FOUR MONTHS! And today Denny just happens to be at the clinic for the first day of his internship. Come on, sister, get on board!
I love it when my doctor says this as he leaves my exam room.
Anyway, while Denny is off having the best day of his life, Lizzie continues to live through the horrors of unplanned pregnancy. Ricky is back, and he’s got some wisdom to impart.
Does this show not like pregnant people? Let’s see… we have Mel, who couldn’t get pregnant and whose husband DIED while they were arguing about IVF. And then she had a miscarriage after enduring the agony of not knowing the identity of baby Mack’s father. And that’s after having a stillbirth.
Then there was Lilly, who abandoned her baby, but then came back for her, and then died of cancer. UGH.
Charmaine, meanwhile, was pregnant for nearly five seasons. She got dumped by Jack, then her jerk fiancee cheated on her, and her babies’ (yes, multiple babies — she has twins) daddy is some sort of criminal mastermind who faked his own death. But he’s somehow not in trouble over running a drug smuggling ring anymore, and now Charmaine has to petition the court for sole custody of her kids.
And now Lizzie, who tried to hook up with Brady, something that is not EVER mentioned, but *I* will never forget, tempted Ricky with her feminine whiles and was denied easy access to birth control, got accidentally pregnant with her terminally ill boyfriend.
Oh, and Brie was sexually assaulted and had a miscarriage too.
SHOW ME A HAPPILY PREGNANT PERSON ON THIS SHOW! Is the “Virgin” in the title meant to be a mission statement?
Anyway, while this show hates pregnant people, you know what it does love? A party! So, everyone heads to Jack’s to celebrate Preacher’s freedom and get a little rowdy.
Another awesome day in Virgin River, for the non-pregnant heroic people. Just in time, too, because we’ve got a wedding to focus on.
But Hope might want to double-check the invite list because someone wasn’t invited and he’s not happy about it!
Anyway, even though Preacher is the one on trial, the only goal here is KEEP PAIGE OUT OF TROUBLE!
And thankfully, the smartest legal minds in VR have assembled to achieve this objective.
Let’s review the roster:
Lead attorney: Brie
Legal background: Actual lawyer, or so we’ve been told.
Connection to the case: Well, aside from defending Preacher, she’s sleeping with the man who helped Preacher try to get away with murder and tipped Preacher off when they found the body.
Weaknesses: Definitely suffering from PTSD.
Assistant attorney: Mike
Legal background: Uh… he’s been in a courtroom before because he’s a cop or something?
Connection to the case: He’s dating Brie.
Tried to cover up this murder, so has inside information that should help the defense.
And, like a true bestie, he let Preacher know when they finally found Wes’s body.
Weaknesses: History of trusting the wrong people.
Case intern: Kaia
Legal background: Loves sandwiches, so definitely knows where to order lunch from.
Connection to the case: In love with the defendant.
(This is pretty big news because she wouldn’t use the l-word before getting divorced.)
Weaknesses: Unsure about being promoted to leadership roles.
Paralegal: Jack
Legal background: Total problem solver!
Connection to the case: Employer, bestie, and confidante of the defendant. Also occasional audience surrogate.
Bonus: He was nearly murdered by the brother of the person who was murdered so he’s pretty familiar with the case.
Weaknesses: Has a lot of irons in the fire: about to get married, building a barn, puppy parent, and currently taking some dance lessons.
With a team like this, Preacher can’t lose! Paige will be fine.
In a town like Virgin River, where time moves at an impossibly glacial pace, this episode began with the biggest bombshell we’ve seen yet:
APRIL?! How many surprise pregnancies have there been since Christmas Eve? How many suspicious surprise grandsons or twin cop kidnappers? How many times did Brady save someone? (#hero)
Sadly, none, dear reader, because this season is a calmer, more reserved Virgin River. Everyone has been juicing, meditating, and writing in their dream journals. These people are ready to be the newer, more improved versions of themselves. They have bounced back from surprise paternity, “devastating” wild fires, and finding out their town was home to a drug-smuggling ring, and everything is really super good now. Just don’t ask any questions: this all makes perfect sense.
Now, we sped things up because we didn’t want to wait 12 seasons for Mel and Jack to tie the knot. But first, she needs a dress.
Valid point, Connie.
And since she’s getting married on a farm, she needs the right women to help her pick up an outfit for the big day!
This makes sense… it’s not like she has a sister or a friend with a large hat or anything to help her select a dress.
RIP, bestie!
She also needs someone to officiate the wedding and style her hair.
Man, it’s great that Charmaine has bounced back from her Christmas Eve delivery and is back to work. Now normally I’d say it’s sexist to ask whose watching the kids, but given who their dad is, I feel like this is a valid question. No, wait, I’m sure she just enrolled them in that awesome preschool…
So, everything with Mel is super duper chill. She also got a great wedding gift!
Jack is also doing super great! First off, he has a horse now, so that’s awesome. Also, he’s tots not afraid of being up on a roof even though his brother died from falling off of one (right?).
He also uses the term “brother” pretty laissez-faire. Sometimes it’s like his REAL brother never even existed!
Now, I know what you’re thinking — not everyone is doing awesome. For instance, Preacher is going on trial for murder.
But, hear me out: it’s pretty awesome that even though he is accused of killing Wes and hiding the body, he’s still allowed to roam town with zero restrictions. And do you know why?
That’s right, folks — Brie is back, and she’s defending Preach! This is her first big case (I’m guessing) so she’s working all the time. I’m not joking! Look:
The best part is, her law office has a pretty awesome WFH policy, which includes having presumably private documents wherever whenever, even if you’re sleeping with a cop who’s connected to the case.
Hmmm, now, I have confessed before that I’m not a lawyer, but isn’t this some sort of conflict of interest? Seems like the man who helped Preacher almost get away with this crime shouldn’t be hanging out with Preacher’s lawyer, never mind have this must access to the case documents. Also, is he gonna be in the courtroom as a co-defendant or what?
Oh no, just for heart-eye emojis. Cool, cool, cool. This case still doesn’t make any sense… but we can’t have multiple people on trial.
Speaking of felons, Brady is also awesome!
What insurance check???
So, wait, Brady OWNED the lumberyard that was smuggling drugs not once, but twice, but is somehow still entitled to the insurance money because it burned down in a fire? Shouldn’t that money be, like, federal property? Okay, sure… I’ll buy it. Good to see Brady’s fortunes have finally turned around.
So, what’s Brady’s big dream for his big payday? I’m glad you asked!
Because…
Now, first of all, half this money should go to Jeb’s widow. (RIP, Jeb: we hardly knew thee.) Secondly, what? Bikes kept him out of trouble? Every time we see him on a motorcycle, it’s some sort of problematic situation.
Like, being tardy for important events.
Or flirting with married women:
Or threatening to commit a crime:
Or running secret undercover operations without being an actual officer of the law.
And yet PREACHER is the one on trial? Okay, I guess this whole insurance thing is happening because the weed people want to steal his money for reasons. And, Lark dances off to the prison to share the good news with person who we definitely remember.
It’s good to see that they renewed his contract. So, he’s also doing great.
The only one not going great in this episode is really poor Lizzie, who’s pregnancy is really more of a PSA at this point:
At least Denny’s here.
Yep, this season is gonna be (say it with me) awesome!
The holidays are all about family, and nowhere is that truer than in Virgin River. After the chaos of yesterday, everyone is slowing down and spending Christmas Eve with the ones they love best.
Mel is standing on her maybe daddy’s porch getting cooking tips.
Calvin (you definitely remember him) is anxiously awaiting the birth of his twin boys. (Nice that he is alive for this moment… that boat explosion was just for funsies!)
And Charmaine is crushing it at finally, finally, FINALLY giving birth. (Reminder, she has been pregnant since season one of this show. Season ONE.)
What this episode really drives home though is that family is something you choose. So, choose carefully. Because sometimes revenge sex with a criminal can be a mistake.
Sometimes choosing not to have kids is more complicated than just saying:
Sometimes accepting a new job means you’re probably going to end up investigating the guy you’re sleeping withwho makes your sandwiches.
But, it’s not always that complicated. Sometimes you’ll choose a good friend who’ll help you cover up a crime.
WES!!!!!
Sometimes, your ex and your new boyfriend end up having a lot in common.
It’s not all giggles and puppies, sadly. Sometimes the formerly homeless pot dealer? addict? enthusiast? single mom whose daughter you rescued (#hero!) is catfishing you.
We remember this guy, right?
And mostly, the more family you have, the more problems you’re going to have.
Unless you can afford to hire help.
So, consider the wise words of Denny (who is reallya lot smarter again in this ep…):
(This makes sense because marriages are famously FOREVER whereas having babies is entirely temporary.)
And think twice about who you let stand under the mistletoe with you this Christmas!
This is definitely the horniest thing anyone has said on this show EVER.
The episode started with Jack discovered Brady discovering drugs in one of the campers in the most confusing drug-smuggling plot ever. Jack was this close to thinking Brady was bad, but then Brady got kidnapped!
Fortunately, Mike — who Jack has on speed dial for occasions such as this — is ready to respond immediately!
Unfortunately, in the race to the big drug bust, Mike forgot to put on his bulletproof vest for the raid and almost dies! (Is Mike good at his job? Remember how Calvin exploded right in front of him? Remember how Brady missed the drug raid? I’m not sure he is the super cop we’ve been lead to believe.)
This puts Shady Brady in a real bind because he needs someone to corroborate his story that he’s NOT a drug dealer.
The thing is, I don’t remember him actually being on the CI payroll, so the FBI might actually have a pretty solid case against this guy.
Anyway, unlike Brie, Mel decides to head to work today where the whole team welcomes her back with an unsettling employee-to-cupcake ratio.
Remember: Four people work here. Four.
It being Mel’s first day back at work, she decides to pitch the clinic — which again, employs four people (one of whom is going blind) — on a brand new venture.
Seems like a very weird day to bring this up because the town is kinda dealing with back-to-back crises. Like two days ago it was on fire and now they’ve just found out a drug lord (drug lady? What’s the correct term here?) was setting up right under their noses. You’d think they would be seriously panicked.
Nah — they are having a carnival!
So, everybody is actually having a pretty stellar day except for Jack, whose assets are being ceased.
Luckily, Brady is along for moral support. It’s nice that even though he is facing charges for smuggling drugs the FBI let him return to the literal scene of the crime to visit his girlfriend.
This makes total sense.
These music captions are killing me!
And then Nick pops by to check on his latest business venture.
Instead of being completely frazzled upon learning HIS SISTER is a criminal mastermind, he and Jack launch a plan to re-home the weed people. You know, Nick may not be mayor anymore, but he sure is thoughtful.
(PS: Are Nick’s assets not also being ceased? Doesn’t he get a ton of money from his sister?)
Eh… details.
Surprise — Mike pulls through after being shot in the chest and has some startling news!
Just to recap…
BRADY IS A HERO!
Weirdly, the one person not affected by any of this drug news is Preacher. He’s got plans today and they do not include moping around a hospital OR visiting a crime scene.
He is really, really sad about Kaia leaving. The sex was just so good, and he can’t imagine meeting someone who’s not entangled in a divorce AND working with (for?) her weird ex AND likes sandwiches. It’s like there are no single women in this town now that Muriel is boo’d up!
She and Cam finally have a green light from their daddy… er, I mean Doc, but it doesn’t come without some casual workplace sexism.
To be clear, he is NOT into this idea. Check the eye roll.
I really don’t get this. He thinks Cameron is a total cad, but he wants him to run his business???
Anyway, this is a real bummer, especially considering Muriel made play for Doc once upon a time. But she deserves to be a happy, so it’s worth the stern response from daddy.
Speaking of daddies…
It’s worth noting the word “think” here. These tests are generally very clear, but considering how hard it was for Lizzie to get birth control, I’m guessing it’s twice as hard to get her hands on a Clear Blue digital. Also, what kind of health insurance do we think Bert offers?
Maybe Charmaine can give her some advice since she’s been pregnant for the last four seasons.
Anyway, her re-appearance indictated the show was about to take a real turn, which — checks watch — happens 33 minutes into this episode. I definitely thought she was gonna go into labor at the carnival and give Mel and Kaia a chance to team up again!
But no, the carnival is just light-hearted fun!
Nice to see JE bouncing back from being questioned by the FBI.
And the best part is, they sprung for fireworks! (Which makes sense given they just survived a devastating fire; this is definitely safe.)
And really, who could resist coming out for this?
Even Calvin couldn’t stay away, enough though he, like Rose, faked his own death.
It’s nice that he’s showing up when it matters most.
Ooooh, Wes/Vince is also making an appearance tonight for the magic! (Odd that these firefighters have NEVER found a body before.)
As if the fireworks weren’t enough, the writers pack one final surprise into this season finale.
That’s right — scatting! They saved the best music caption for the very last. Also, they gave us a little something to look forward to next season.
Joey and Mel’s mom knew someone in Virgin River! Small world, especially since no one ever leaves this town unless it’s to join the military or testify in a trial.
Anyway, turns out Joey has been attending Preacher’s Masterclass on how to be detective because she’s got some big news.
I finally figured out what makes Virgin River so special. It’s not just that it’s a place to make a great salary without a college degree.
Or a place where people will accept you unconditionally no matter what you look like.
Or a place where the food is unbelievably good.
Or even a great place to find love (with your ex cheering you on from the sidelines even).
Virgin River is special because when you’re here, you’re family. Yep, just like The Olive Garden. No matter the obstacle, these people find a way to show up for each other.
Take Hope, for example. Just because Vernon’s not-dead ex is coming for a mini-visit doesn’t mean she’s not rolling out the red carpet.
Her kindness leads to a truly moving apology from Rose about the whole sorry-you-didn’t-get-to-meet-the-son-you-never-knew-you-had thing.
*Tears*
Meanwhile at the clinic, Muriel and Cameron are facing their own challenges.
Now, we all know how R+J ended.
Side note: This is a weird metaphor, Muriel, especially since you also made a play for the the man you’re now referring to as dad.
Anyway, like any good family, these two know they are stronger together. They decide to find to find a way through…
*Phew*
I like this pairing as much as I like soup, salad, and breadsticks at the OG, but I feel like Cameron is stretching the truth a tiny bit here. You’ll recall:
Cameron split up with his fiancee because they had NOTHING in common.
And then he made a play for Mel.
Who he had known for… let’s say, two weeks.
He hasn’t felt like this in a while? I don’t know, Cameron, you’re gonna have to do some work to convince me that you’re not just after Muriel because she’s got a pretty… um… face.
Anyway, I just hope Cam is here for the right reason.)
Not all families are blood-related, of course, which is why it’s nice to see that Brie has formed her own work family!
You recognize all these people her office, right?
Brie’s not the only one playing games though — Brady’s also got plans.
Are Brie and Brady finally moving on? Brie’s been hesitant, but her work bestie finally gives her the courage, the way a true bestie always encourages ordering the chocolate lasagna brownie at Olive Garden.
And so, Brie finally decides it’s time to let Brady go.
The timing of this could have been rough for Shady Brady who has been known to react poorly to the thought of Brie and Mike, but Lark (Lark? who named this poor woman) is on it like grated parmesan on your entree!
Yeah, if only someone could appreciate what Shady Brady brings to the table. I mean, have you seen this guy sneak around? He’s, like, really good at it. Like, yes-I-will-have-another-bowl-of-minestrone-soup good!
Anyway, speaking of tables… Preacher’s cooking up something.
Thank God Hannah is here to speak for us all.
Unfortunately, before Kaia can taste this fusion, Jay interrupts, which is like if the fire alarm went off at Olive Garden right after your food was finally brought to the table. Not cool!
This is the face of a woman who has just been told that there is indeed a end to Olive Garden’s never-ending pasta bowl.
I am sooooooo confused by this. Why on earth would Jay be in charge of evaluating whether or not his wife could be in charge of the team? How is that not a massive conflict of interest?
And in case you missed it the first time, Jay reminds Preacher (again) that he is here to stay. Kaia can’t quit him… I mean her job.
They’re family!
What Jay doesn’t know is Preacher has gotten rid of at least one bad husband before…
I seriously cannot get enough of the music captions this season!
Anyway, while Preacher is busy plotting how to get rid of Jay (poison panettone french toast, anyone?), Brady stumbles on to a MM’s secret plot to smuggle drugs through the glamping site. He has to protect Jack because Jack is his family, and family always sticks together the way you can’t not get breadsticks at Olive Garden!
Okay, can someone please explain this drug smuggling plan to me? They are putting the drugs inside the trailers which are stationary… so, are only drug dealers going to book at the glamping site, and then check out with a little something extra? How are they going to replenish the supply? Who’s gonna keep putting the drugs in the trailers? How are they going to ensure that a “legit guests” like Lark (or some other member of the weed-flag alliance) aren’t going to accidentally stumble on to the drugs ala Jeb and sample the product?
All I know is that this plan threatens to break Jack and Brady up forever, which is about as heartbreaking as never being able to eat Olive Garden again!
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